Maidens and Monsters

setfabulazerstomaximumcaptain: commanderbishoujo: setfabulazers...

Thu, 23 May 2013 14:12:25 -0700

commanderbishoujo:

setfabulazerstomaximumcaptain:

God

The “born this way” argument needs to die forever

seriously I am so fucking tired of it and this banal kind of remedial HRC Gay Inc. understanding of sexuality

and on top of all of the binarism and erasure of sexual fluidity and polysexuality etc

IT’S A SHITTY FUCKING ARGUMENT

the minute people get sucked into making this argument they’ve already lost the debate because they’re playing by the rules of the oppressor by accepting their framing of said debate.

they’re buying hook line and sinker into the idea that acceptance and human dignity are conditional

do people even understand what they sound like when they say this shit

“ACCEPT ME BECAUSE I CAN’T HELP MYSELF”

queerness is still being pathologized by this argument, you are fucking apologizing for your failure to be heterosexual when you say this

the answer to “is being queer a choice?” should not be either no or yes

it should be “IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER”

I will give a fuck about “gay genes” when they find the right-wing gene or the Catholic gene

^The above.

THIS.

diloolie: zambiunicorn: fausterella: Want. holy...

Thu, 23 May 2013 12:48:22 -0700

diloolie:

zambiunicorn:

fausterella:

Want.

holy shitttt

this is interior porn. You cannot convince me otherwise.

excuse me why do I not live here

mark aguhar (1987-2012)

Thu, 23 May 2013 11:24:29 -0700

mark aguhar (1987-2012)

Things That I Need To Remember

Thu, 23 May 2013 10:09:45 -0700

I’m still allowed to have boundaries when I’m better.

I’m allowed to say, if I need to, “I have a managed mental illness and I have to say no because this is triggery for me.”

I’m allowed to say no, even without that postscript.

I’m allowed to do whatever makes me healthy, even if those things are coping strategies, because I’m never not going to have a mental illness — I’m just going to live with it in a better way.

down the well: jealousy

Thu, 23 May 2013 09:47:02 -0700

and another thing

when i went to my doctor and told him that i was worried my psychosis was coming back and we went over symptoms and stuff

he asked me whether i’d had a recent upswing in interest in religious matters

and i was like oh shit

because i got into religion again when the paranoia started to get worse

and upon realizing that i got really angry

because i started getting jealous of people with psychosis who were able to believe in god because of their mental illness

because of all the fucking symptoms i have for this horrible disorder

i don’t have the one that i want the most

i’m stuck here in my endless battle with atheism

constantly struggling with my inability to believe in a god no matter how hard i try

i’ve tried hypnotizing and brainwashing myself for fuck’s sake

and it’s never worked

none of it does

i’d give almost anything to believe in god again like i did when i was a kid

a simple and uncomplicated belief

before i was shot down by atheists when i was an impressionable teenager with so many self-esteem problems i didn’t hide my self-abuse because i authentically thought that no one cared enough to say anything

and i haven’t been able to move past that situation

i was like okay these men are better than me and they’re telling me there’s no god so they must be right

and that was that for the rest of my adult life

it makes me want to punch things until i break every bone in my hand

i hate my atheism so fucking much and i don’t know how to deal with it or make it go away short of having some religious nutcase kidnap and drug and brainwash me until i believe

and that’s like

really fucking messed up that i even consider that a viable option

because i’ve convinced myself that it would be better than what i have now

and that’s not okay

down the well: birdsong

Thu, 23 May 2013 09:44:35 -0700

so yesterday after checking with the friend who owns it, i took the bird to the friend’s relative

because i just couldn’t deal with it anymore

like by the end of the second day i basically ended up with this horrifying paranoid delusion in which the bird was dirty and diseased and evil and i was going to catch something from it

so i started avoiding it except when i needed to feed it

and actually made myself physically ill with worry

like, vomiting

it got to the point where i would literally break into a cold sweat every time it made a noise

and i knew intellectually that it was fine and there was nothing wrong with it and that i was making myself sick by being so fucked up about it

but now that it’s been gone for 24 hours i’m still getting triggered by BIRDSONG OUTSIDE and it’s driving me absolutely bugfuck insane

i know this will pass

i know it’s temporary

but goddamn if it isn’t the most annoying thing in the world

this is what it’s like to have self-aware mental illness

the hardest part is knowing that what you’re doing is chemically induced and messed up and wrong

and seeing the stupid line of delusional reasoning that lead you to this point of panic and paranoia and not being able to do a damn thing about it besides shoving your face into a pillow and screaming I REFUSE TO BE AFRAID until you believe it or you lose your voice

and i think the worst thing is that the whole situation is making me look at my relationship with the friend who owns the bird and evaluate it in a way i hadn’t thought of looking at it before

i came to the realization that i’ve forgotten how to put up boundaries with certain people because i love them and don’t want them to leave me

so i end up being too nice

and not only working for free when asked but offering to work for free just so that i can see the person more often

like this desperate need

and it isn’t at all like me because i’m not a social person and don’t require or even like people and am not sexually or romantically attracted to others

(and god knows i barely have time for myself anymore with my job and my volunteer work and my business so why would i want to compound more volunteering on top of that even if i enjoy it)

and the whole situation with the bird made me start realizing how fucked up that is

i offered to take care of that bird while she was away on business because i’ve gotten to the point in my relationship with this person where not only am i incapable of saying “no” but also that i’ve manipulated myself into offering a “yes” before it’s even asked for

putting myself out there for free because i want validation or praise or something equally messed up

i’m not even sure what i want

and i feel like that’s the worst fucking part

i can’t draw boundaries because i don’t even know what they are or why they need to be there or where i need to draw them

i stayed up until 2am talking about this with a friend who also has mental illness

and we really didn’t suss anything out except that things are fucked up and that i want to get better

but i’m getting worse and i’m really scared that i’m not going to get a therapist before the shit hits the fan and i hit that point of no return where i need to be medicated forever

i can’t function like this but i can’t function on medication either

i just want to be normal

and apparently that’s too much to ask

thekarlitatv: mercuriesrising: vantasticmess: w-for-wumbo: I...

Wed, 22 May 2013 15:36:49 -0700

thekarlitatv:

mercuriesrising:

vantasticmess:

w-for-wumbo:

I am so glad someone made this cuz I’ve always wondered how the movement of the solar system might look as a whole….

BUT LOOK HOW EPIC THE SOLAR SYSTEM IS GUYS

PEOPLE DON’T BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY WE’RE NEVER IN THE SAME PLACE ONCE.

I WASN’T FUCKING KIDDING.

WOW

HOLY BALLS

This is Korean: 안녕하세요

Wed, 22 May 2013 14:12:19 -0700

This is Korean: 안녕하세요
This is Japanese: こんにちは
This is Chinese: 你好
They're different.

justoneboi: NOW STOP PRETENDING that it does not...

Wed, 22 May 2013 12:48:13 -0700

justoneboi:

NOW STOP PRETENDING that it does not exist.

BOOST!!!!

That’s me!

We exist and there are a LOT of us. Stop ignoring our existence.

"I’m going to tell you what a demon once told me: It is okay to want your own happiness. It’s okay to..."

Wed, 22 May 2013 11:24:15 -0700

“I’m going to tell you what a demon once told me: It is okay to want your own happiness. It’s okay to care about yourself the most. It’s okay to do what’s healthy for YOU. When someone hits you, it’s okay to hit back and then ask them what the hell they expected. It’s okay. You are not obligated to sit there and smile and swallow every bit of shit everyone heaps on you. You are more than furniture, you’re more than window dressing, you’re not their shiny toy. You’re human, and you have the right to say “That was shitty of you”. You have a right to say “Let me feed that back to you; tell me, how does it taste?” You have a right to protest your own mistreatment and set boundaries for respectful interactions. The rest of the world doesn’t realize you have this right, and they will act offended and appalled when you exercise it, but it is yours.”

- SonneillonV (via sonneillonv)

Why aren't more people freaking out about the new Venezuelan labor law?

Wed, 22 May 2013 09:47:46 -0700

dancepunksnotdead:

You know, the one that gives housewives/full-time mothers a pension— wages for housework?

It’s ONLY A HUGE VICTORY FOR FEMINISM, SOCIALISM, AND WOMEN OF COLOR. Not a big deal or anything. Tumblr is mysteriously silent about this.

http://rabble.ca/columnists/2013/05/venezuelas-new-labour-law-best-mothers-day-gift

WHY have I not heard about this before now OMG??

Scalzi weighs in on the Kindle Worlds copyright debacle, and the future of fanfiction.

Wed, 22 May 2013 09:41:46 -0700

Scalzi weighs in on the Kindle Worlds copyright debacle, and the future of fanfiction.:

I maintain the position that yes, currently, almost no fanfic writer is paid for their efforts, and being paid at all is better than not being paid. But writers need to be fully and totally aware of that copyright clause before they publish through Kindle Worlds. Amazon owns the copyright of whatever content authors sell through this new model, and the original creators have the right to take the author’s ideas wholesale without attributions or permissions.

Although in the end, it’s kind of a moot point, because more than 50% of fanfiction (and most of the good stuff, in my opinion) is of an erotic nature, and Kindle Worlds is having none of that.

I’m intrigued to see what happens next!

shalrath: requested rebloggable

Tue, 21 May 2013 15:36:31 -0700

shalrath:

requested rebloggable

keepcalmandwearafez: copperbadge: Sir Reginald Wiggly When...

Tue, 21 May 2013 14:12:28 -0700

keepcalmandwearafez:

copperbadge:

Sir Reginald Wiggly

When someone knits or crochets me something this is how I picture it happening.

i would pay one of my knitting friends to make me an octopus with a top hat attached so awesome

SHRIEKING

Guys. GUYS. FANDOM SCOUT

Tue, 21 May 2013 12:48:23 -0700

scifigrl47:

flightinflame:

Based on the fandom scout idea of scifigirl47 (who is one of the most amazing writers I have ever had the pleasure of reading),which I felt was rather amazing. Her words, I just stuck them into an image so that I could have it on my tumblr.

Read More

Damn staight. 8)

Beautiful.

"May God bless you with discomfort at easy answers, half-truths, and superficial relationships so..."

Tue, 21 May 2013 11:24:32 -0700

“

May God bless you with discomfort at easy answers, half-truths, and superficial relationships so that you may live deep within your heart.

May God bless you with anger at injustice, oppression, and exploitation of people, so that you may wish for justice, freedom and peace.

May God bless you with the foolishness to believe you can make a difference in the world, so that you can do what others claim cannot be done.

”

- A Franciscan Blessing.

What I want my life to be.

(via kelsey-leann)

keepcalmandwearafez replied to your post: Okay. Mental illness is all about doing lots of…...

Mon, 20 May 2013 22:55:00 -0700

keepcalmandwearafez replied to your post: Okay. Mental illness is all about doing lots of…

you are baby sitting a bird. i wonder how your cat is going to feel about that. hope you have a good night of recovery

So far he feels very, very confused as to why there is a very large chirpy box covered in a towel, but he was sufficiently disinterested to leave the room shortly after. We’ll see how it goes, by which I mean that I plan to keep them well separated. I’ll probably post a little video about the wee birdie tomorrow when I feed him — spoilers, he’s a 3-4 week old baby starling and possesses illegal amounts of cute. (I say he, but we’re assuming. It’s really, really hard to sex baby birds.)

And I did have a pretty good night. :) I hope you did too.

Okay. Mental illness is all about doing lots of little things in order to accomplish big things, and...

Mon, 20 May 2013 20:43:29 -0700

Okay.

Mental illness is all about doing lots of little things in order to accomplish big things, and about little things being the toolbox to recovery, right?

Right.

So tonight, while I’m waiting for the bird I’m babysitting to arrive, I am going to tune my mandolin, which I haven’t touched since the autumn of 2012.

Little things.

I might even play it.

Photo

Mon, 20 May 2013 19:44:00 -0700

GUYS GUYS REBLOG THIS POST

Mon, 20 May 2013 15:57:59 -0700

jojenobrien:

Show Yahoo that we are OKAY with them buying Tumblr as long as they leave the current terms and conditions intact and the enforcement policy.

Aka, the site remains the EXACT same as it was before. Keep Tumblr the same Yahoo and we will stay.